It was okay, then Alice my friend and a nurse insisted (she can be a total bitch) I take a painkiller, of course that messed up my focus completely and threw off my hypnotic suggestion which I use to shut down the pain receptors. Ironically I cannot seem to shut off my allergy to dust. Oh, yeah it was the standard bullshit Mensa test, ten patterns or something, oh and while I am terrible at trivia, I am actually much smarter than a fifth grader, I mean one kid told me he was smarter because he could do math better than me and he could, so I choked the little bitch to death, who is the smartest one now?

Stephen Hawking walks into a bar.

What did the over confident jack-ass say to the hot girl, You'll do.

Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

What's worse than a black guy? Two black guys....and a dead white man.

Why can't Larry drive? Because he doesn't have his license, and his temps expired!

What's worse than being a midget Being a midget with no legs

Who gives a shit? Justin Beiber.

A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

Why did the gay kid drop his ice cream Because he got punched in the face.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

What's worse than getting in a car accident? Being turned into dust and swarmed by bees while on fire

The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

What does an otter and a pencil sharpener have in common? They both feature in this joke

The first train go fowards at 250 mph, and the second train takes a left, how many pancakes are on my rooftop? - The answer is purple because aliens don't dribk coffee

Joke below was made by Daniel Textor, he's a d i c k.

What's black and fast? A treadmill.

What did hitler do with the vegetarians? Nothing, because he was one.

Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet You have pancreatic cancer

Whats worse than breaking your Xbox? Being raped by your dad.

What do you get when you cross Skyrim and Call of Duty? A video game that has similarities to Skyrim and Call of Duty.

What is brown and sticky? A Stick

What do you call an African man with no legs? Murderer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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