why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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what is the difference between a picture of brooklyn decker and my grandma....i jack off to the picture of my grandma

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There were two busses. The one was red, the other one went to France.

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Why did the chicken taunt the opposing team? To get to the other side.

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A lesbian couple, a straight couple, and a gay couple walk into a bar. They enjoy their drinks and camaraderie.

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Who would be an amazing GOP VP? Chris Christie -Mitt Romney

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungie cord? My ass.

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What did Harry get for his Birthday? Nothing nobody likes Harry.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

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Whats funnier than a massacre? Everything.

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Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

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How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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Why did Sally fall off the swing set? because she had no arms. --- Knock, Knock Whos there? Not Sally.

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Why did the black man get arrested? He sold cocaine.

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Can u explode on me.......Plz.........no........ok.

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What is white but you can't see it? A bottle of milk around the corner.

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Q: whats the difference between a t.v and a dead baby? A: i don't have a t.v in my garage

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your sister has 1 boob thats funny

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You go on Nero, he got all red, not sure if he is mad or ashamed or both, but we can all tell that man is jealous. Employee.

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Why did the Japanese man fall down the stairs? He was blind and deaf and not aware of his surroundings to prevent himself from doing so.

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What do you call the black stuff in between an elephant's toes? Depending on the location of the elephant it is either dirt or it may be tar in the case of an elephant in captivity.

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When will pigs fly? When they grow horns

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops