“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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What do you call a cross between a dog and a bumblebee? One messed up lab experiment!

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whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Ask nicely.

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Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

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What do you call an Englishman, an Irishman and a Chineseman playing football? 3 friends playing their favourite sport.

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

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Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

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Whats a movie? A moving picture.

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Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

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There was once a really smart Hufflepuff.

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why has kallum just changed clothes to speak to a counsellor because he's socially awkward and has no peers

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Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

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Ian: Your Mama's so dumb, she tried to commit suicide off a sidewalk. Dan: Yea, and when that didn't work she hanged herself.

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Why does Suzie like to wear sunglasses? Because she's blind.

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Whats worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bees stings? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bee stings. Now, if you have been well-educated you should be able to tell the problem with this joke. Unless you know someone whos jewish and lived during the holocaust, you couldn't be sure if three bee stings was actually worse than the holocaust. If ou do however, thats good for you, keep it to yourself.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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Why did the President fall down? He was assassinated. -mattobrado

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A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

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catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

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A tortoise went for a run. It took him two hours to get around the corner.

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Why did they serve Swiss cheese at the church? It was lunchtime.

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What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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