What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

How do you keep a black man from hanging around your tree? You cut the rope.

What do you call a black drug dealer? A black man that works as a drug dealer

What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

A bloke runs into the bank, says to the girl "Stick 'em up!" She says "Righty-o, matey" and sellotapes his bollocks to the ceiling.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog.

why did the supermodel have sex with the janitor? she loved him. and he was brad pitt.

the midget went to the midget store

how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 16 if the ice cream melts

Why did the pony say neigh? That`s all he can say

What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

A man climbs a tree, falls, and breaks his legs. He will never walk again

A muslim walks into an airport. He then buys his ticket, boards his plane, and his flown to his proper destination.

What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

The boy asks his dad if he can make him a sandwitch The dad reply's " no thats your moms job"

Why is the boy sad? He was getting bullied so he later on talked to a teacher and the bully and him settled their differences. The bullied boy still wishes the bully to go to hell.

What is worse than the holocaust? DUH! A worm in MY apple!

Emily Walker.

Why did they bury the indian at the top of the hill? Because he was dead.

What did Big Dog say to Little Dog? "We are both dogs."

A horse walk into a bar. Several people leave, as they recognize the potential danger in the situation.

Why can't helen keller drive a car? Because she is a woman

What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

Charlie, Charlie the drunk guinea pig! OUR BEST FRIEND!!! Angel Charlie: I'm already dead yah poof!!! Butt cancer killed me.....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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