What do a Jew and a homeless man both have in common? They both get nothing for Christmas

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What do you call a banana in a blender? A banana in a blender. Duh

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What's the best part of having sex with twenty-four year olds? There's 20 of them.

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Sharvil has aids 4 times

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Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Q. What did the fat man say when he ate a salad? A. Yum.

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What happens when you drop a baby? It falls.

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Where were guinea pigs created? Probably in Guinea Land or something.

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A janitor walks into a bar. He cleans the bar.

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Your're racist.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme oo

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What's plastic and kids turn it on... A xbox.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Why is 16 scared of 17? Because 17, 18, 19 *crickets*

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What happens when you get caught inside a tornado? You don't, the debris around you will most certainly kill you before you get close to the tornado.

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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Why are black people like trees? Because they fall down if you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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How do you get your dog to stop barking? You snap its neck.

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what did the kid with no arms and no legs get for x-mas a bike

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You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

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What do you get when you run from Long Island to New Mexico? Tired.

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What's wrong with a black man in a bar? Nothing, Except the fact that he is an alcoholic, and will probably beat his wife after drinking.

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What's the difference between a Jewish child and pizza? Pizza does not scream in the oven.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops