Q: What would George Washinton do if he was alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

*insert corny "a man walks into a bar" joke here*

knock knock whos there your mother open the door

Whats worse than being raped? Being raped twice.

What has eyes but can't see? Helen Keller. What has ears but can't hear? A field of corn.

What's slower than mollasses? Your fattass mother!

Roses are red, You're a failed abortion, Happy Valentines Day. :D

A man walks into a bar After months of rehab he is giving in to his drinking abuse again and will ruin his life as well as his family

Roses r red, Violets r blue, u think id eva cry ova u?? I told u i luvd u, n u believed it true... Well guess wat baby? U got played 2 B)

What do you tell your dad if he constantly gripes about his balls? He's got testicular cancer and he's going to die a horrible painful death.

Did you hear the one about the broken pencil? Never mind, it's pointless

How do you get an elephant into a freezer? You stuff him in there!!

Q. What do you call a retarted guy? A. Whatever his name happens to be

Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

Knock Knock! It's me! Hello? Hello! Why didn't they answer him? He was at the desert, with a disconnected phone. Also, my Captcha for this is "lose face" Good job solf mediya

knock knock whose there? penis penis who? penis want vagina

why did the clown cross the road? to kill everyone in the dark knight midnight premiere

What goes round and knocks on windows? A paedophile.

I like my 40's like I like my women, in ABUNDANCE.

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Orange you glad your whole family isn't dead from a fatal car accident?

Two tomatoes where crossing the road, when one of them barely avoided being run over. The other said, come on tomato!

Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

What happens when a girl sticks her head in a birthday cake? She gets a toothpick stuck in her eyebrow. Trust me..I know.

why did the white man walking down the street have no hair? he had had cancer for 5 years prior.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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