What did the apple tree say to the farmer? "Stop picking on me"

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So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

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So there's a black man riding a bike down the street. A police officer pulls him over to tell him that his back tire seems to be flat. The black man says thank you, and continued riding his bike. Later, he would repair his tire.

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What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

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Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

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Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

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I typed in in a Anti-joke and realized it was kind of hard.

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What did the boy say to the girl? I like you hi.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are flowers, And daisies are too.

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Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

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Most people like to drink beer, others do not.

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Roses are reds violets are blue when your parents says your beautiful they're lying to you

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding the holocaust? A worm

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So my teacher came upto me, and says "At the end of this ruler is a idiot" so I said "Which end?" I got detention.

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anti jokes are really funny

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A man looks in his toilet and gazes in fear of the fact that there is blood on his bowel movement. He has colitis

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What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

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what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

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A horse walked into a bar. The bar was part of the fence he was enclosed by.

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Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

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Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

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Why did the swing fall off the girl? I have dyslexia

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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