What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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Why can't girls count to seventy? Trick question. Clinical research has proven that a fair amount of girls are, in fact, capable of counting from one to seventy using ordinal numbers in the Arabic numeral system.

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I would like a pint of..........beer." The bar tender asked "why the long pause?" The bear replies "I think I just had a stroke."

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like if u think princess kenny id the fairest maiden in all the land. if u havent played or watched pewdiepie play south park the stick of truth, disregard this message.

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There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

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If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

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Why did the boy cry? His Parents died.

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"What's up?" "A movie about an old man who takes his house to South America by tying balloons to it, who accidentally brings along a young boy with him and they have an adventure."

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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why is dog animal? it is not fish! 18 fits of has hair only have is Buddhist

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Why didn't Helen Keller learn to drive as a teenager? They didn't have cars back then.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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Why did the fat guy pick up a noodle from the floor with his buttcheeks? He felt like pasta.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was standing next to you.

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a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

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What do you call Jake Morter? Jake Morter

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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My great grandfather died in a concentration camp. The poor guy fell off the guard tower.

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How do you blindfold an asian? With a blindfold.

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What happens when two black people go into a store with masks on? They buy candy for Trick-or-Treating

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hey i jut met u, and i have alzeihmer, cheese and toast

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What does a tomato and a human have in common? They both spray red liquid when stabbed repeatedly

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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