why did the boring girl get ditched she was boring...

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What do you call an elephant and a rhino mixed? Ahellifiknow.

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what do you get a man with no arms or legs for his birthday? a quick, painless death.

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what did the boy with cancer get for christmas? i dont know he's jewish

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Sex

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A.M.E.V.A.A A-ny M-essage E-xpressed V-ia A-cronym is A-wesome

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Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

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Q: How do you know if you have had too much to drink? A: When you find a bloody hole where your kidney is.

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What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree He was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was staples to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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How did the corpse cross the road? They can't cross the road they're dead.

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Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

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Do you believe in magic? cuz i do.

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H2O corndogs running around naked CC

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Did you hear about the homosexual that walked out of a hospital? He just found out he was HIV positive. (ic3)

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What do the holocaust and new born babies have in common? Nothing. Except some babies are born in Germany.

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How do you drown a blonde? Force her head underwater until she can no longer breathe, thus shutting down her brain and killing her.

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Your girlfriend.

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how do you have sex? i dont know im under age!

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What did the fat man say to the Spaniard? Nothing. The Spaniard was skinny and so the fat man was jealous and shot him in the face.

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Whats worse than hard cheese?Cheese DUH

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Your mama so fat that when she cut herself gravey came out and we drank it too!

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I'm a psychic. Don't believe me? Think of any number between 1 and 20. Got it? Your number is 17. Please comment if I got it right

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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