If I fly my canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, then how many lollipops does Obama have? None, because dogs can't use flashlights.

womens rights

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

Knock knock How is ? Bond ,James Bond!

Two muffins are sitting in the oven. One says wow its hot in here the other muffin said HOLY SHIT ITS A TALKING MUFFIN

Why couldnt the girl braid her hair? She had cancer

Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

Why did the blind boy cross the road? Why? The world may never know. He was hit by a bus

What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

what is 1 plus 1 i don't know ask your teacher

What's sweet and tastes like candy? Candy, now get in the van.

Why was the plumber sad? Because his family died in a car crash

Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

How do you circumcise a cat? Shoot an orphan in the leg with a rail gun.

What's a Democrat's favorite activity? Blaming Republicans for shit they didn't do.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? I don't know, he couldn't open the presents.

Thanks I guess, I do look a lot like that anime, except my eyes are not giant and I got lips and you know about everything else is different, besides I wear blue or brown contact lenses Ohh, and in case you had not already noticed, I dye my hair brown, believe me, there is enough red in me to go around already... Nero huh? Angelo Nero? So what kind of sick parents did you really have, or do you have? This is weird, you suddenly got even more interesting Nero.

What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

Q: Why were there four married men in one room without their pants on? A: because it was the mens bathroom.

Why did the black girls wear fancy clothes to the mall? Public nudity is considered a crime in many parts of the world. It would be advisable to wear clothes in public areas, so as to avoid being arrested.

Why did the italian go to jail? because he had just robbed a bank and then brutally murdered his wife and kids.

Why did Sally cross the street? Because someone was gonna rape her if she didn't.

Barak Obama, Justin Bieber, and Lindsey Lohan all jump out of a plane. all of their parachutes deploy. except Justin Bieberrs, he then dies of cancer

What did the Atheist say to priest? Evolution

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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