Why did the old man die? He was old.

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How come Kristin cant go play soccer anymore? She broke her leg kicking her brother in the face.

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Yo momma's so ugly that she could not find another partner after the tragic death of your father

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How do you make a plumer sad? You kill his children.

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Q: why does the cat go out of the house by the window A: It doesn't the window is closed

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Once upon a time

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What did the dinosaur and John Wayne say to the Easter Bunny? Nothing, they're both dead and the Easter Bunny isn't real.

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Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

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What happens when you wake a sleepwalker? Waking sleepwalkers does not harm them. While it is true that a person may be confused or disoriented for a short time after awakening, this does not cause them further harm. In contrast, sleepwalkers may injure themselves if they trip over objects or lose their balance while sleepwalking. Such injuries are common among sleepwalkers.

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Whats wrong Nero? What happened? Please pick up the phone, I am trying to call you, but it just goes from dialing to changing tunes, please do not be upset with me, what did I do wrong? I thought we had an understanding, please just pick up the phone, if you already have my number and all you got nothing to lose...

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What do you call an asian jumping off of a building? A suicide victim.

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Why can't black people swim? Many of them can. It's racist to assume that.

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Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

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OMG YOU BOUGHT ME FLOWERS THANK YOU

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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A car with four Mexicans drives off of a cliff. What's the bad news? They were my friends.

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why do women rip you off? Because they like money

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what do you call a a miget crossed with a vampire? A miget, vampires are a figment of you're screwed up imagination.

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-Knock knock -Use the doorbell -Oh... ding dong -Who is it? -Me -Oh -Yeah -Cool -Come in -Okay -Take off your shoes -Alright -How are you? -Good -That's good -Yeah -Okay -K -Oh -Bye -See ya

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Chuck Norris counted to infinity; by calculating the sum of a divergent series.

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what is blue and smells like fish? blue fish ;)

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Why did the chicken cross the street? Because the light was red and cars had stopped.

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A horse walks into a barn.. The farmer says "why the long face?",This frightens the horse ultimately leads to the farmer getting kicked in the teeth

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what did the cripple, the cancer guy, the blonde, and the blackguy have in common they all have no reason to live

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops