Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

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Why did the little girl have grass stains on her white dress? Because she was dragged into the forest and raped.

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what is fun to eat but dumb when its alive? A dumb yummy candy

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A man walks into a bar. Ow

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what did the kid say when he didnt see the ice and sliped and broke his arm ouch that beep hurt

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Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, So what is the colour violet for?

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why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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what did god say when we made his first nigga oops i acidenlty burnt it

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Q. Whats the worst soccer team in the world. A. Ass-enal.

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

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Chuck Norris will eventually die because he is a human being, just like all of us. His movies weren't very good either.

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What's blue and looks just like water? Water.

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Why did The Chicken cross The Road? The Chicken was a new drug dealer to town and he did a deal with The Road , the town's existing drug dealer (they used these nicknames to hide their identities), but then back stabbed him to try and take the whole area for himself. Money and Power, as always.

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Why couldn't the mentally retarded kid hear? It was too dark.

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roses are red violets are blue i have AIDS i'm about to die

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why didn't the chicken cross the road? It was very unhealthy, and had a heart attack attempting too

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What's a boulder's favorite type of music? Boulders don't have ears.

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Why did the man murder his wife? Because she would'nt do the the dishes

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I'm shy. The last shitbender. How do you fit babies in that bowl? Get a blender.

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why did the boy get hit by a bus? because he was black

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A plane crashes in the wilderness on the border of Canada and the U.S. Where do they bury the survivors? I lied. There were none.

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Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish.........That's a government lake. You're under arrest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops