Q. Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A. Because he has no arms.

My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

A policeman walks into a pretzel shop. He sees two freshly baked pretzels. One was a salted.

Coach walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The bartender says, i can't serve you. You aren't wearing pants. Coach says "put it on my bill."

drugs.

Why was the blackman fired from his job? Beacuse he was late too many times which was unacceptable.

Your momma is so fat, shes skinny.

Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

why wasnt the baby cute? -because it was dead

Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

What's the new green? Green

Why did the baby stop laughing? Would you if you pooped your pants?

What did Jimmy get for his first bithday A coffin

hey chris what yu doing wit my back pack? using it..

If life gives you lemons, you're setting up a bad joke

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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