What's the difference between a Jew and a Canoe Well one is a human, beating heart, and the other is a small boat you row in

Why shouldn't you tell a joke during an earthquake. Cause it is not the time nor the place to tell a joke

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? I don't know, dinosaurs have been extinct for 200 million years.

A man was late for work, he came to a stop for his third red light. He stopped and waited for the red light to turn green then continued on his way to work.

What do you get when you cross a hooker with five shots of tequila? Herpes

What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

Ask me if i'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

What do you do when you see an ostrich playing tennis? I don't know as I have little experience in the areas of ostriches or tennis. Frankly, I'm not quite sure why you're even asking me

Can yas all stfu SBBBBBBBBBSBSBSBSBSSBBSBSSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBSBBBBBB

A lysdexic man trys to rite a joek... the people who tried reading it got confused and offered help in rewriting it.

John is at the movies, when he drops his cookie on the floor. A passer-bier accidentally steps on it as he's about to pick it up. "Sorry" says his man. "I guess that's the way the cookie crumbles" said Terry. The man then proceeds to murder Terry.

A priest, a rabbi, and a buddhist monk walk into a bar. The bartender says " What are you drinking?"

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

Robert: wanna hear a joke? Robort:ok, shoot. Robert: *BANG!*

What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

whats worse than getting raped by ben rothlesburger well rape-victims claim that rape has ruined their lives and most of them go into deep depression and need therapy so maybe the only worse thing is getting raped again by kobe ---sticksack

Why couldn't little Susie ride her bicycle? She had Cerebral Palsy.

Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

Why did the mans nuts itch he had crabs

Sam murray got home after school one day, he siad hello to his father and possibly played some Avatar on the D.S

Why did the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field

what didn't Jon go to the movies? He tripped and broke his neck and cant look up

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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