- Anti Joke

Fact: When you die, you can't eat ice cream!

Knock Knock.. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Daves dead. This is Darrell.

Why did Johnny play piano with one hand? Because he lost his other one in a mining accident when he was 10. Johnny lives in rural Perú so he had to support his 6 younger brothers and sisters by working in a child factory.

How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

Roses are red Violets are blue Just smoked some Meth nelnfjknfkjnwkejnkjnwefkjnKJNFKJRNFKWNEFEJNFJNWKEJNWFKEJFN

Q. What is the answer to life the universe and everything A. 42

What's worst that cancer? Murder porn

What's worse than getting raped by a duck? Getting raped by two ducks.

What song did Buddy the elf sing for Santa on his birthday? Happy birthday

what's black and can't swim? a black refrigerator

I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

Whats the difference between the Pope and acne Acne doesn't get onto a kids face until they're 13

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

Roses are red, violetsvare blue, I have aids, so do you

Wanna know a Chuck Norris fact? He is 72 years old and likely to die soon

Q: Why was the balloon scared of unicorns? A: Buses dont exist therefore the balloon was just insane.

Why was the truck driver speeding down the road? To get to his mother's funeral. Why didn't the baby cross the road? Because it didn't have any guts.

What did Oprah get for christmas? Weight Watchers

A handicapped man walks into a bar...

Q: A woman is hit by a motorcycle. Whos fault was it the motorcyclist's or the woman's? A: It was the motorcyclist's fault. He shouldn't of been riding his mortorcycle in the kitchen while she was making my sandwich.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops