Why was the boy with no arms and legs crying? He had a lit match in his anus.

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A: Knock, knock. B: Who's there? The writer of this joke had no idea how to end this.

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Why did the poorly educated man get fired from the M&M factory? He changed the M's to W's!

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face" and the horse says "my wife just died of skin cancer."

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

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What has hands but can't clap? - A Quadraplegic

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Life is like a bucket of wood shavings. Except when they're in a pail. Then it's like a pail of wood shavings.

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How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

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The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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What happened to the guy that got a perfect score on his S.A.T.'s? He was murdered.

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Why do people where saggy pants that don't fit? They can't afford too buy new

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you know your just like my pinkie toe........eventually i am going to bang you on a table

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What's the difference between a leopard and a jaguar ? The rabbit flies faster, while the pigeon can breathe underwater.

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how do you open a can of coke with no tab? throw a washing machine at it

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What did the cow say to the farmer who was driving by in a tractor? MOOOOOOOO!

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That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you thought it gay unicorn

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why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

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Why did the girl throw her watch out of the window? because her mind wasn't as intelligent as a normals person mind as she had mental problems.

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how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Six Million Jews.

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Yo mommas so dumb she took an IQ test and scored low on it

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What do Miley and Bill Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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