What's 8 foot tall and can't breathe? Ryan Eisenhour

What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both live underground apart from the eagle.

There is a wizard standing on a street corner. A boy walks up to the wizard and says, "Can you turn invisible?" The wizard replies, "Oh, I'm not a wizard. I'm a hobo with a long beard and a bathrobe." The hobo then proceeded to begging the boy for money.

There were 3 men on a rough each granted one wish to make. The first guy sees a bird and runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a bird and he flies away. The second guy sees a butterfly so he too runs and jumps off the ledge and wishes to be a butterfly and flies away. The third guy telling himself those were all stupid wishes, makes up his mind what he is going to wish for so he runs to the ledge and just after he says "I wish to be" he trips on the ledge and says, "shit!" So his wish was granted and shit he became. The End.

Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

What's worse than being a Jew in the Holocaust? Nothing.

knock knock who`s there me oh come in

Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

Why was the little boy afraid of the dentist because he was a pedophile

Why does Apple hate Blackberry? They don't fruit can be rivals.

Roses are red My name is Dave This poem makes no? sense Microwave

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

What has a black, blue, and red all over? Timmy. He was mugged, and vigorously raped.

"Hey! Did you get a haircut?" "No, I just started chemo..."

How did the fat guy survive the plane crash? Because he still in the food court at the airport.

Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

A priest, a Muslim and a Rabbi sit next to each other on a plane they say nothing to each other during the flight and reach their destinations safely.

An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

How many people can you fit in an oven? Six million, according to Hitler.

What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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