What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

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Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

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Why did the bird fall out of the sky? Someone shot it.

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2 big black men walked up to me with baseball bats. they politely asked me if i wanted to join their friendly game of baseball

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Holy sh** a talking muffin!!!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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KONY 2012! *world rises up cheering in spontaneous patriotism for Africa* Leader of KONY 2012 arrested for public masturbation

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Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

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"Wise old man, what is the meaning of life?" "I don't know why do people think old people are so wise these days?"

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

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While getting Sherrie's Crabcakes I was arrested by Missy Hepp highway patrol.

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A man walks into a bar an orders a few pints. He then goes home and brutally rapes his wife and chains his staring kids to a fencepost in the backyard along with their deceased dog named Spot.

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How many Jews can you fit in to a car? Well depending on the car 2-8

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Nobody cares maddie!

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Your momma's so not fat that when a school bus rolled by here house, she just sat there and turned on oprah.

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What do you call a man having sex with his own mother. - Gross.

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Your mom is so environmentally conscious, she recycles a great deal.

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A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

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There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

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roses are red violets are blue does this smell like chloroform

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How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

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Steve: Ask me if I'm a tree. John: Are you a tree? Steve: No.

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How do you get through a locked door? Unlock it.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's Where am I

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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