There's a black guy in a mansion. What's he doing there? He owns it.

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What is life? Paul.

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So three ants are in a straight line. The first ant said there's an ant behind me, the second ant said there's an ant behind me, and the third ant said there's an ant behind me. Why is this? The third ant lied.

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Man: Hey girl for a minute there I thought I had died and gone to heaven, but now I realize that I am very much alive, and that heaven has been brought to me. Girl: No actually you were right the first time we are both dead right now.

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Cornflakes were an accident, so was Chernobyl

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

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What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

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how do you make kindergarteners unhappy? you taze them.

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What's the one game that black people are good at? Flashlight tag.

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What is 33 + 1? Penis

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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1+2 = 6

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Roses are niggas Violets are niggas I'm lil Wayne niggas rhymes with niggas

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

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jingle bells jingle bells,, bells were jingled!

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Guy 1: Why did Captain Hook die? Guy 2: Because he wiped his anus with a hook? Guy 1: No, because everyone dies.

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Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

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How can you tell if a duck is behind you? Turn around

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Q: what did one guy say to another guy? A: I don't know!

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Why did the catfish cross the road? Catfish can't walk.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

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happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

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Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops