What did the flag say to the pole? It dosnt

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I swear to god it wasnt me Dont swear to go its a sin !

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A man walks into a grab and go restaurant and asks the man if he can stay, the man replies "yes."

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There is a law in california that says that women are not allowed to drive with house coats.

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If your fighting an octopus on mars how many lamps does it take to repair a dog house? Nine because a toaster cannot ride a bicycle.

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Why did the head football coach go to the bank? Not to get his quarter back cause that'll cost him at least ten million a year.

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I read a haiku. It was honestly quite good. That's basically it.

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Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Why are black people like jelly beans? Nobody likes the black ones

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

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teacher: say ur alphabet kid: abcdefghijklmnoqrstuvwuxyz kid:wheres the pee teacher:half way down my leg

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How do you get 50 Babies into a phone booth? A blender How do you get them out? Doritos

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Mommy, Mommy, I don't like Daddy! Well leave him on the side of the plate and eat your peas instead!

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage?

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Bare with me here, im gonna change this up a bit What's better then finding a worm in your apple

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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A baby is cold and won't drink it's milk It's dead

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A man with his masters degree, has a great job, and gets good money. Has a wife and kids. He is very successful.

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You know what's funny about AIDS? Nothing.

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What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

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Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

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What do you call a giraffe without a neck? Dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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