What did the African-American toddler from Compton get for his birthday? Most likely nothing, seeing as his father left his mother briefly after his birth, and his mother uses all of her money to feed her heroin addiction.

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A black man walks into a bar. "Whoops, that's not the Weed shop!"

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There is a young boy called Clive, and his dad asks him what he wants for his birthday: "I would like one yellow golf ball please dad" he said. Of course, his father was quite surprised by his son's request, but nevertheless, he got him a yellow golf ball for his birthday. A few years later, clive does amazingly well at school and gets all As in his final exams. Filled with pride and love for his son, his father says to him: "I can't begin to tell you how proud i am of you, Clive. In fact, you can have a preasant! What do you want?" Clive thinks for a moment. "i would like one hundred yellow golf balls please!" His father was a bit annoyed at his strange request, but neverrtheless, gave Clive his yellow golf balls. A few years later, Clive wins the gold medal at the olymics for the 100m sprint. His father is very proud: "Son, i am so happy about the way you've turned out. You make me so proud. Is there anything you want me to do for you?" "can i have 1000 yellow golf balls please" Now his father got annoyed, he thought Clive was taking the piss. Eventually though, he calmed down and got clove the golf balls. Unfortunatley, Clive gets diagnosed with a deadly disease. His father is heartbroken. And as clive is lying on the hospital bed, his father moves close and speaks to him. "Son" he said, tears welling up in his eyes, "I just want to ask you one thing." "Ok," Clive said, as he too started to get emotional. "Why on earth did you want all those golf balls?" Clive looked deep into his father's eyes, as he took his last breath said: "I wanted them because- ack -splutter- ack" And he died.

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OH MY LUMPIN GOD!

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Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

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Why did the angry kid press the button? The button said "press here angry kid"

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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How do you fit 10,000,000 jews inside a car? It's not physically possible as no car can carry that many people.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana Your parents must have little regard for your social identity because they named you after a tropical fruit. Either that or you are clinically insane. I am concerned; please leave.

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A black guy , a white guy and a jew walk into a resturaunt They are offered the special.

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ROSES ARE RED VILOIT ARE BLUE MY NAME IS MISIMOA AND I SMELL LIKE POO

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What did the cookie ask the glass of milk? Will you wash me down

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8--------------------- penis

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Why is my room black and white? Because your in a black and white movie.

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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Your mom is so environmentally conscious, she recycles a great deal.

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Why couldn't the teenage pirate get into the movie? Because he lacked the required money for the ticket.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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How do you confuse a blonde? To get to the other side

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Why did the clown chase the boy? The boy was sad and needed cheering up

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Joker: say knock knock. Person: knock knock Joker: Who's there?

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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josh sucks polish adams dick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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