How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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Q: Whats 5+5 A:10

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what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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How many people can you fit in an oven? Six million, according to Hitler.

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Until further notice Penn State's take your child to work day has been canceled.

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Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

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A Jew and a Neo-Nazi meet in a bar. They put aside their differences and enjoy a few rounds of drinks.

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I'm typing this one handed... ... Because I'm an amputee.

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how do u get the baby to stop choking? take ur dick out of its mouth!!!

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what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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Hey Babies, The holocaust called, they want their screams back

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Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

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What is the way to a man's heart? Through his stomach. With a knife. Then then go up a little.

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Gay marriage is freaking gay.

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"This is Jesus Christ to Tim Tebow. Please leave me alone. Don't you know that my day off, is Sunday?"

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I was on the other side. And I'm a chick magnet

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What did Steven Hawking get for christmas? A bike.

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Knock knock Whos there? Sorry, wrong house,goodbye!

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Why did your girlfriend dump you? because someone brainwashed this guy into believing this nonsense.

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Your mother is so fat, that making fun if her is a terrible thing to do.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops