What did the man do to the begging orphan on a cold Christmas morning? He kicked him.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the black guy hanging from the tree? Because he committed suicide because his wife of 20 years left him, is only child hates him and due to the bad economy is job at wall street was terminated.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the red bag have written on it? Yellow bag

thumb_up thumb_down -3

why aren't doughnuts square? because they are round

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock knock, Who's there Why did the chicken cross the road? Idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are red, violets are blue When I cut you, you bleed

thumb_up thumb_down -3

There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was Timmy sad? because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did Bush really get into the White House? The front door.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Waitress: Would you like to have a drink? Customer: (Looks at the drink's menu) Hmmmm... What are my choices? Waitress: Yes and no.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats the difference beetween a pilgrim and a jack-o-lantern? Jack-o-lanters didn't discover america.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's brown and red? I lied about the red, it's dirt.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse replies, "My wife is dying of terminal brain cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Ed Milliband knows what's best for the UK.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock Who's there? Your a slut

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock who's there? Steve Steve who? Steve. I already told you my name.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why was the boy in a wheelchair raising money to buy a basketball uniform? Because wheelchair basketball is a popular sport

thumb_up thumb_down -3

So this guy is waiting for a heart transplant. He dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you scare a plumber? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock Knock.. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Daves dead. This is Darrell.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Roses are red Violets are blue Most poems rhyme This one does, too.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops