OMG, I have a really funny alzheimer's joke. Your'e gonna love it! Uhh, I umm kinda forgot what it was now.

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What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

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What did John's girlfriend get him for their 5 year anniversary? Proactive because his acne bothers her.

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F Detroit! I'm more of a Bulls fan

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69

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An Englishman, A Scotsman, a Welshman, an Australian, An American, A German, A Swede, A Kiwi, An Austrian, A Belgian, A Frenchman, A Chinese Guy, An Indian, A Turk, A Czech, A Canadaian, A Russian, A serbian, A Portuguese, A brazilian, An Argentine and a South African go in to a bar. The Security stops them and says "I'm sorry i can't let you in without a thai"

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Why has 8 wheels and costs more than a Lamborghini? Two Lamborghinis.

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What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

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What did the orange say to the apple? Nothing, fruits can't talk.

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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Your dads so fat he needs to go on a diet

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your mama's so fat she wears big clothing

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Your momma's so stupid, she threw out all the W's in the m&m's packet

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What do old people break when they fight? A sweat

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What's the best thing about 23 year olds? There's twenty of them.

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A postal worker creeps past a sleeping bulldog. The dog does not wake up, and the mail is delivered successfully.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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What's worse than no wifi Nothing.

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What's so similar about a zombie and a black man? They are both almost human.

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Why did it look like the girl peed herself? Because she peed herself

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What's the difference between a dead Blackman in the road and a dead dog in the road? There's skid marks in front of the dog.

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Roses are red. They also have thorns. Their family is Rosaceae and they are often given as gifts between lovers. They grow in well drained and fertile soils...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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