Why was Six afraid of Seven? Seven was in a horrible car accident recently and became very disfigured. He didn't tell Six, so the initial shock of seeing him for the first time was quite jarring for Six. Seven has had multiple surgeries since and, once the swelling recedes, he should look much better. It will still hurt for him to chew though.

What do you do when life gives you lemons? You apparently are not a fan of lemons what so ever, so you then throw them away, not knowing what to expect.

What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

What has one head, three eyes and seven legs? A cow with a tri-pod rammed up it's arse. The third eye is a result of a birth defect.

How do you get rid of Herpes? You can't.

Knock knock Who's There Sally Sally who? Sally who .got hit with a fridge and fell off a tree because I have no arms. Sorry, I do not know you.

Whats the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the elephant.

A: Knock Knock (pause) B: Please use the doorbell, it is very late and I like to be considerate of my neighbors

What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

Roses are red Violets are blue Still the Holocaust

What's the difference between a fat person and a whale? The quality of the fat. -Japan

Do cows get breast cancer or utter cancer?

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

NO I AM NEROCHAN LEFT!

Why couldn't the pirate play poker? Poker is a tricky game - maybe he'd never been taught how to play.

A wise man once told me that friends are like cookies. He was a cannibal.

I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

Why did the boy fall out of his seat? He was being strangled with a piano wire.

I've got some good news an some bad news. The good new is that you just won 10 million dollars! The bad news is I'm just kidding.

Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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