What is Colder than a witch's tit? Not much. It was removed for biopsy and kept in the pathology freezer. At absolute zero.

Two cows grazing by the road. One says hey what's all this about mad cows running around? I wonder what is it like? The other says I don't know I'm a helicopter.

A black man walks into a bar and orders a shot. He then precedes to drink it.

Why did the war end? Because one country surrendered. They were getting beat pretty bad, it seemed like the only viable option.

There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry." "No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away." "I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

How many babies can you fit in a blender? Depends how hard you push.

How do you starve a black man? You deny his foodstamps ~Katie&Lena&Shelbey(:

What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

what did the drunk man say to the bar tender? Hello good sir. Fine day today isn't it.

Why did the kid poo his pants? Because he was Matt Daly

What direction do 5 gay guys walk? I am unable to answer that because they are all aspiring to work in different occupational fields.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Unfortunately there are billions of chickens in the world and based on the question it is not possible to determine which specific chicken is being referred to. Even if we were able to ascertain this knowledge it would be unlikely that we could determine its purpose, as chickens don't usually make decisions based on logical thought.

When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

The Ohio State Buckeyes

Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

WHATS THE BEST AVENUE TIN SHACK AVENUE

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

What did one volcano say to the other? Nothing. Volcanoes are inanimate objects that do not possess the ability to speak.

A man was walking down the sidewalk. Then he turned into a drugstore.

Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

Did you hear about the kidnapping? Well you should be very concerned because he hasn't been found in 4 years.

Your mom's so dumb she has cancer...... oh wait that's racist

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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