Start by getting your fucking ass off this site and get me the fucking money asap yourself! And your contact information! Fuck your "eye for an eye" piece of shit example, I want redemption! If I am to live with self respect after losing a FUCKING EYEBALL! I demand that you lose EVERYTHING YOU HOLD DEAR! YOU FUCKING QUEER HYPOCRITE! And I am not asking that you take away everything, I will take everything you hold dear away from you myself! Then again, why do that when I can get straight to the source and break your spine, and that is just the first step to making you wish you where dead! That you end up begging me for THE SWEET MERCY OF DEATH! Listen, if you want to talk, lets talk, if you claim to be so fucking powerful get on a goddamn jet and get over here yourself, no goons, no "shadows", no "followers" of "your order" when you present it, and "our order" when YOU FUCK UP! Only then will I "listen to reason", it is only reasonable you come out of your fucking hiding place and face me! I wont fight you, I wont kill you, but you better get your fucking face over here yourself.

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What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

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How do you get dislikes on anti-joke.com? You can dislike your own post from several different IP addresses.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

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You wanna see something really scary?

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All the planets are named after gods Ours is named after dirt....

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A Duck, a Mexican guy and Helen Keller walk into a bar. The bartender asks "What do each of you want?" The duck doesn't respond because is is a duck. The Mexican guy doesn't respond because he doesn't know English that well. Helen Keller does't respond because she is dead.

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Why was the old lady sad? Her husband was raped by an angry gallon of milk.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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What do you get when you cross The Incredible Hulk and King Kong? Two angry fictional characters.

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What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? How would she know? shes blind, deaf and mute; and incapable of knowing what she received.

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Q: Whats the difference between a Jew and a Boy-scout A: Boy-scouts come back from camp

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why did the computer monitor stop working? Becasue it has a date with a slice of cheese.

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hey justin

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What do you call a girl with ADD and too much free time? Me

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Homosexualism is so gay man

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Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

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i wonder who made this website? a human

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What happened when Susie fell off the Ferris Wheel? There was an open seat.

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What happened to the white man who beat up the black man? He was arrested for assault and battery. What happened to the black man who beat up the white man? He was also arrested for assault and battery. Their races have no superiority to the law.

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How do you make a 5 year old cry? Kill their parents.

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Why did I the granda fall out of her wheel chair?. She fell down the steps

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What's a good joke? France going to war and winning.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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