Is your refrigerator running? I heard there was a power outage in your area.

Whats better than seeing a worm in your apple... Reading the the next anti-joke.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a blind-deaf-mute.

Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

Knock Knock Who's there? Boo. Boo Who? Boobies.

Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

Why was the man sad? His wife left

Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

Selena Gomez, Victoria Justice, and Arianna Grande walk into a bar. They were making a movie.

When I grow up, I don't want to be a therapist. I have enough trouble figuring out the problems in my math book.

Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

What do you call a homosexual in a wheelchair? A cripple

Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was assaulted because they were walking in Detroit.

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

how big is a black mans penis? idk ask his wife

Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

What has 156 bras and 927 pairs of underwear? Someone without a washing machine.

Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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