Two 16 year old girls are chatting on their way to school: Girl 1 : "hey, is that a hickey on your neck? say, have you been naughty? is it Brian's mark?" Girl 2 : "That's not a hickey, it's a bruise. My dad came home drunk again last night and beat me up for no reason."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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god made the sea god helped invent the first wheel but as you know he also made me a really big deal !

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he was raped.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a retarded failure

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What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

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why is 6 scared of 7? because 7 eight 9

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whats worse than someone on the phone during a movie? your mother queefing on your bowl of cheerios

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

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You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

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a man was shot.... he died

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Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

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whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

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Pete and Repeat were on a boat. Pete fell off. Who was left? Nobody because Repeat is a good friend and he went in after Pete.

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What happened to the little boy that went to The Penn State locker room? He had a great day meeting the team and watching the football game.

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What's the difference between shoes and babies? You can't eat shoes.

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A woman stopped making sandwiches.

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what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

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Roses are red Violets are blue and oranges are orange nothing rhymes with orange

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What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

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Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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all your base are belong to mark

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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