What do you call a black man flying a plane? The pilot. You racist.

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Q: Suzy loves apples she will o anything to get her hands on an apple. A: You guys are so gullible!!! She DID eat Tom's apple. ...... then he killed her.

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Q: What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? A: You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

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It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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Q: what's worse than getting the flu? A: getting cancer

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What's the difference between a melon and a baby? You have to cut open the melon before you can eat it

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Hey. I came up with an anti-joke. I posted it here.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends what its name is.

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You're so vein you are probably a tube that conveys blood from various parts of the body to the heart.

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How does a boy with no arms or legs cross the street? He doesn't

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What happens when you go from a jew to a penguin? A huge climate change.

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Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

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Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear asks the rabbit does shit stick to your fur? The rabbit says no, so the bear wipes his ass on the rabbit

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bologna

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How much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The Holocaust

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ohai. whutz en ahntei johk? sownz soopihd.

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what do JFK, plato, and a dead penguin have in common? theyre all dead.

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A- Why did the chicken cross the road? B- I honestly do not care.

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Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

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Q: What did the fish say when it swam into a concrete wall? A: Fish don't have vocal cords that allow them to speak in a way discernable by humans, and if they did, it would just sound garbled and bubbly due to their being underwater.

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What happens when metal and ice collide together? The Titanic

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Today is jessica's birthday and she is turnig 6 She walks in the living room to tell her dad its her birthday. Jessica"Dad, Dad guess how old i am today!" Dad "How old?" Jessica"6 dad im am 6". she walks into the kitchen to tell her Grandad Jessica" papa papa guess how old i am today" Grandad"Well for me to know this you would have to take of your panties" as he tells her she did as she was told. her grandad fingers her and smells her panties. He tells her "You are 6 today" Jessica"How did you know" Grandad"I listen as you told your dad in the dinning room".

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house No Oh... well he hasn't either

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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