Q: what smells like cheese and tastes like cheese? A: cheese

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Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

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Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

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Your dad isn't gay...but his boyfriend..HES REALLY GAY!

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Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

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Boy 1: What comes after L? Boy 2: Elephant, elbow, elk, elementary, Elliot, Elder Scrolls? Boy 1: No. Boy 2: What is the answer? Boy 1: M

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If little jimmy has five candy bars and he eats three, what does little jimmy have? Diabetes

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What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

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Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Mike: Johnny pass me the sauce Johnny: I can't pass you the sauce Johnny could pass Mike the sauce as he has no arms and Mike kept on asking as he has short onset alzheimer's.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

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Watch brand new car videos at carvideos website

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Why'd the squrille fall out of the Tree? Cause it was dead

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Why did the boy not answer his mums call? because he was dead

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One asks the other "Isn't it hot in here?" To which the other replies, "Holy ****, a talking muffin!"

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Q: what did the emo girl use to check her email? A: A computer.

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How do you kill a blonde? Drench her in fluoroantimonic acid and watch her explode in a violent and gruesome death.

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Ok so, we have bread , tofu, coolwhip

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Why did they bury the fireman on the east side of the green grassy hill, to the left of the old well, underneath the huge apple tree? Because he was dead.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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What do you call a fucking idiotic douchebag with ebola? An ebloa paitent

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Q: What do you call an anti-joke? A: An anti-joke

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the awkward moment when your mom wakes you up and you realize she died six years ago

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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