Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Ele PHa n T

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

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Do you have emotional issues, ever have a really bad day and just wanna talk call this number (402-314-5287) < N1GGER

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How did Pablo get into America from Mexico? He drove here!

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Where does a blind person drive a car? Into a tree.

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What do you call a pool filled with black people? A pool

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Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

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What did Batman say to Superman? Nothing, he killed him with a kryptonite spear.

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Person 1: what is 2 + 2? Person 2: 4 Person 1: no Person 2: what is it than? Person 1: vagina

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If you know someone with the last name Schmidt. ALWAYS ask him to take a Schmidt on your chest

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

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Why couldn't Stephen Hawking run a marathon? He was struck by a very serious disease, otherwise known as refrigerator to the face, at the age of 5.

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Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

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What do you call a black stormtrooper. What ever his name happens to be.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally. Why did Sally fall of the swings? She had no arms. Why didn't Jimmy help her up? Jimmy is a fish. There's a guy with no arms and no legs who loves to swim. What's his name? Bob. Ya know Bob's twin brother is in the same condition. He loves to play in the leaves. And what's his name? Russell. Why couldn't Sally swing on the swing? She had no arms. What did the girls mom tell her to do before she went to bed? Go to bed. How do you wake up Will Ferrell? You set his alarm clock to a reasonable hour. What did the fat man who had his car stolen tell the police? Someone stole my car.

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Vagina Boob

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer...and the other is a watermelon.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says to the man nothing. Because It's a duck.

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Q: How do you give a frigid woman an orgasm? A: By making her come.

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Robert: wanna hear a joke? Robort:ok, shoot. Robert: *BANG!*

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How are a black man, a hispanic man, and a chinese man similar? Believe it or not they all love cantaloupe!

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Why is the bowler right handed? He has no left hand.

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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