A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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A Black man walks into the Dentist's office, because he cares about his hygiene.

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Q: How do you eat a dead baby? A: One piece at a time.

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What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

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An Irish man walks into a bar, and then realizes that he's walked into the wrong establishment (He was looking for an upscale restaurant.)

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What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because there were no cars in the way.

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5 Jewish men walk into a bar and are expected to be treated nicely

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Did you hear about the comedian cereal killer?...He raped his victims before strangling them to death.

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Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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Roses are yellow, violets are grey, I'm colorblind

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for his birthday? A bicycle.

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Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

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A kid walks into the car and the dad says, "Wear your seatbelt".

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Jimmy is taking a walk to Dairy Queen he walks into an allyway where he is shot with a 44 magnum and later dies in hospital his family morns

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

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You know what would be funny? If the Incredible Hulk asked Spiderman to change his diaper.

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What did the strawberry say to the elephant? Nothing. Because it's a strawberry and strawberries can't talk.

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Q: What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? A:One is fun to hit with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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Its a bird!! Its a plane!! No, its a bird.

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What do you call a Mexican without any arms or legs? A bean.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops