Q:What did Sandy say to Spongebob? A:Nothing, They were both crushed by the water pressure of being on the bottom of the ocean.

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how do u wake kesha up? Answer:set her alarm clock to a reasonable time

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Your mother just died.

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What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

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What did the paper say to the pen? Nothing, they are inanimate objects!

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Bob: This joke is so hilarious but you must start off by saying knock knock. Tom: okay... Knock knock Bob: who's there? Tom: ...... Bob: well? Tom: I don't know what to say??? Bob: so the joke left ya speechless!

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children are much like potatoes. when you eat them, they die.

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Why do women have boobs? In order to feed their infants

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What did the Christian say to the Muslim. Nothing. He understood his right to have a opinion even if his religion is against it.

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I think everybody should have a penis.

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What do you call a black priest? Holy s***

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Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

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How do black people vote? They go to their polling place, register, then vote for their candidate on election day.

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Rose are red Violets are blue all I what to know is what do that mouth do

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What did the Brontosaurus say to the Triceratops? Nothing. Neither of them have ever existed.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Erm Wait why would a chicken be on the side walk in the first place?

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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Well, first of all, what I have overcome both mentally (trauma) and physically (lots of shit) is in the past, lets leave it there. Second yeah, I can basically shift my sense of left and right at will, meaning I can choose which arm to write with, and write things mirrored without even thinking about it, I can fool my senses basically, one second I struggle playing the piano because I have just trained with one, then I make my brain believe I have been practicing with both, its simple, but complicated to explain, while my ears are perfectly normal, I got two sets of balance nerves, it just gets more complicated from there.

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Penis

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Three men walk into a bar, the bartender asks why are you three men in here? The men look confused and suddenly leave

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A boy got a dog for his Birthday. The dog would have said happy Birthday but dogs can't speak.

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Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

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Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

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Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops