What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

thumb_up thumb_down -11

what do you call a person who rides a bike a lot? BATMAN!!! -s.s

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a whale driving a plane? A horibble massacre.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

I know there are, its not the illuminati, its not reptilian shapeshifters, nor Gods politicians nor the human condition. Its society today as it stands, they did not have the right to attack us, but if we had surpassed them, they would have lost all power, they are the relics of the past, and no matter how many of them stand, they do not grow, and what does not grow, stagnates until it finally dies. Lose hope in people most all you want, but not in the few that truly believe in you for all the good reasons in the world, perhaps we are idealists, or maybe we know that with you by our side, what we see as ideals, is something you can make come true.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

In what way are a pile of deceased children and a Ferrari F430 similar? Neither can be found in my garage, nor anywhere under my possession. As for the Ferrari, this is an unfortunate truth. Due to Ferraris' high level of desirability, and to their low supply, the cost of one such car is much more than an average person can afford. As for the pile of deceased children, anyone in possesion (for lack of a better term, as one can not truly possess another human being, even post mortem) of such a grotesque thing is probably too sick and twisted to be submitting jokes with no apparent climax in hopes of stimulating the minds of the joke's readers sense of humor.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

a guy walks into a bar. he suffered a severe concussion. BECAUSE THE BAR A POLE

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Q: A woman is hit by a motorcycle. Whos fault was it the motorcyclist's or the woman's? A: It was the motorcyclist's fault. He shouldn't of been riding his mortorcycle in the kitchen while she was making my sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Kid 1: Mama why is my name Daisy? Mama: Because when you were born a daisy petal fell on your head! Kid 2: Mama why is my name Rose? Mama: Becuase it was a nice name.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

thumb_up thumb_down -11

You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a guy with no legs and no arms? Mat.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

whats a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What is yellow and smells like a flower? A yellow flower :)

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a shiny new Cadillac? I don't have a shiny new Cadillac in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why did the chicken cross the road? I never got to ask it got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

whats the sad part of 4 negroes driving off a cliff? the car couldve fit 5

thumb_up thumb_down -13

An Aussie, a Mexican and an Asian walk into a bra. You read that wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

its all shi.ts and giggles.... ......until someone giggles and s.hits

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Yo mommas so fat We are terribly concerned about her health

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Knock knock. Whos there Time to get a watch

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops