Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Penis knuckle.

How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

I once shot an elephant in my pajamas. I suffer from a debilitating sleep disorder.

a. get me a drink b. a would but but i got no arms

The funniest thing happened the other day, it was like one went like this, and the other went like that, and then everyone laughed... ...Oh, its one of those where you would have had to be there to see how funny it was.

Knock Knock Who's there? Gilbert Gilbert who? Goddamn it David just open the door

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

here's my two cents worth! *hands you two pennies , entire life savings*

What starts with F and ends with UCK? FUCK

whats worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in ten dumpsters.

How do you kill Helen Keller? With a gun.

Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

Q: Why didin't fat billy take the last peace of pie? A: cuz he was not hungry

A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

John: Hey Debbie, do you wanna go see a movie with me? Dina: My name is Dina

What has wheels and is green all over? Grass... I was just kidding about the wheels.

Why couldnt the man stop dancing? He had Parkinson's.

Why did the man take off his pants A: because they were uncomfortable to sit in

Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

What's the difference between 2 pieces of meat? Nothing

What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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