Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead

How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

A traveling salesman came into town and needed a place to stay for the night. A farmer told him that he could sleep at his house, where he introduced the salesman to his young, sexy daughter. "Why hello," said the salesman. It's very nice to meet you." And then he went to sleep in the bedroom that the farmer had prepared for him.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

How do you kill a blond? Make her listen to the song "Friday" for two hours straight.

whens your birthday? July 16th What year? Every year

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, my chickens aren't allowed in rural areas...

There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

How are a duck and a bicycle the same? They both have handlebars. Except the duck.

What does Batman say to Robin before they get into the Batmobil? ... - Come on Robin, let's get into the Batmobil...

A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

Row, row, row your... Canoe.

A guy walks into a bar and thinks of a superlative anti-joke. After having an enjoyable time at the bar he then promptly goes home and posts it for the world to see.

The.

What was Michael Jackson doing at the Dermatologist's office? He was getting a mole on his back examined to be sure it wasn't cancer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

Scenario: 2 people are in a desert. There is only 1 bottle of water left to drink. Who drinks it? Neither of them, they drink the gallon bottle of gatorade instead.

What did the Buddhist say to the hot dog vendor? I don't eat hot dogs. Thank you though.

Obama

Where should a 500 pound alien go? On a diet.

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 killed 6's family

Why do blacks have a little white on their hands? God has always said that everybody has a little good in them.

What's worse then biting into a apple and finding a worm? I can't think of anything worse.

What happened to the cat How should I know it's not my cat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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