Knock Knock. (No answer) Knocker: " I guess the resident of this home isn't home at this hour."

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A seal walks into a club.

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what happened when u got some swag? i don't know u still don't have any

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Robin, please, get in the Batmobile

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Why don't black people ever defend themselves on anti jokes? Because black people are slaves.

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what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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What did the old man say when those damn kids stepped on his lawn? Nothing one of those kids killed him around three years back....

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Why did the bald man die? Cancer.

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What did the woman with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A diagnosis.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Then the man pays for the beer and drinks the beer.

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I walk up in the morning feeling like pdidy who's pdidy grab my glasses out the door I have no glasses girl going to hit the city how do I hit the city ugh this confersasion is over song hmmff

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A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

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Yo momma's so stupid, she got a moderately low score on her SATs, and sadly, was not excepted by any colleges she applied to, and never got a job. This is why she became depressed, and resorted to suicide to escape the growing pain.

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A black man goes down to Alabama in the 1960s; He gets lynched.

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away? What about the vampires?

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Why did the rooster cross the road? Because he wanted to prove he wasn't a chicken.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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Why is Harry Potter fake Because its a movie

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Q:Whats worse, being chased by a chainsaw or being dunked on by LeBron James? A:Since a chainsaw has one of the sharpest metal blades know to mankind, it would be the chainsaw. Although this reguires effort, it is a known fact that Lebron James has been dunked on by some kid at Xaiver, so I would think the chainsaw would hurt more.

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Did you here about the 2 guys who wanted to go to Paris? They didnt go!

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How many calories are in a bag of Fritos? 160 calories.

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A man walks into a bar. He then walks out of the bar a while after. He then goes home and goes to bed. And then he goes to sleep. And then in an odd time travel paradox,a T-Rex arrives from the past and kills him and his entire family.

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I once went to a chiropractor. She was so awful looking. You know those weird spiky fish with the lightbulb hanging off it's head? .....I saw one in a documentary once.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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