What is brown and salty? A pretzel.

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A women answers the phone. -"Hello?" -"Yes, hi, have I reached the Smiths?" -"No, you've reached the wrong number" The two women hand up, and continue with their lives.

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What happened to the vegetarian when he tried outdoor survival He died due to lack of energy because of his refusal to eat meat and or any living substance

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Whats worse them finding a worm in your apple??? finding out your adopted

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Why is Wednesday a bad day? Because at some point, Monday will come around again.

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Why did i try to write a funny joke? Cuz i was desperately bored.....

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Q: What's worse than a worm in you're apple... A: The fact that you have all-timers and can't remember...

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A: Ask me if I am an Orange. B: "Are you an Orange?" A: No.

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Man: Did it hurt? Woman: huh? Man: Did it hurt when i killed your family?

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Why did the man jump in front of the car? He was clinically depressed, his wife left him and took the kids, he just lost his job. He thought he saw a 20 dollar bill in the street So he stopped to pick it up, not realizing a car was speeding toward him.

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Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

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I was about to do an triathlon, but i took an arrow to the knee. It got infected and i promptly died two days later.

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How do you survive the zombie apocolypse? You avoid dieing or being mutated in the living dead.

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What do you call potato salad in Iceland? Edible. The fact that it happens to be in Iceland doesn't make a difference

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How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

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Joke below was made by Daniel Textor, he's a d i c k.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Penis.

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A Jewish person was found dead in an alley way last night, Hitler did nothing wrong.

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where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

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What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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Nickelback

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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