Q: How do you shoot blue flames from your hands? A: You start to duck and lean forward quickly before you fully reach to duck as you punch as hard as you can, a blue flame should come out as Japanese bullshit automatically spews out of your mouth. It should not take more than a try or two...

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Why did the cops beat up rodney king? Resisting arrest.

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What do you call postman pat without a job? Pat.

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Be careful not to say Betelgeuse 3 times, because if you say Betelgeuse 3 times, then Betellllwoow that was close.

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Whats the difference between a person with cancer and breakfast? Breakfast is important

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Why don't nuns wear bras? Because god supports everything!

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Roses are red Violets are blue Btw I have aids And now you too

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A Jew walks into a bar...He uses his coupon to get a free drink, then leaves.

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Knock, Knock.. Whose there? Its the Census Man!!

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What's better than Sookie? The holocaust

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How big does your mouth have to be to eat a baby? How would i know, i'm not a canible.

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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"Why did the clown fall off the swing" "he was shot in the face"

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What do you call a kid with leukemia and no arms? Names.

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What did the child get from there parent on Christmas? Nothing. He's an orphan.

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The $5.00 Foot-long at Subway's is actually $5.45 due to tax.

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What did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

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guess what>? your mum lol

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Why don't black people listen to country music Because every time they here hoe down the think there wife just got shot No sorry for anybody who's black I luv ya don't think twice I have thirty blk friends

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Why didn't Lucas want to go down the slide? He was scared.

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Cause KFC was chasing him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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