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Blonde: what does IDK stand for? Brunette: it stands for I Don't Know Blonde: okay, I get it now

Technically rainbows are white.....and have gold at the end.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have altzeimer's, Cheese on toast

How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

Why didn't George Washington get his drivers license? Cars were yet to be invented.

There once was a girl who took away my source of entertainment. Her name was Nicole.

What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

oh whatever Greece isn't going to leave the eurozone shut up about it already

What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

What's worse than finding a baby in a dumpster? Being late on your taxes

Why did Billy start a fire? Because he was cold.

What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

Knock knock. Who's there? Blanket Blanket who? Blanket, son of deceased recording artist Michael Jackson. Ever since his father died there has been so much stress in the family that he could not handle it. He ran away and is now seeking shelter and grief council.

Why did labour not win the election in 2010? Because they are clearly shit.

What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

where does al queda go on a business trip the twin towers

What happened to the black man when he was hit by a truck? He died.

A blonde is walking down the road, and she sees a sign saying STOP. She carries on walking. As a pedestrian, the sign does not apply to her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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