i was born with 99 medical problems, and the difficulty to count till 100.

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What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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Why was the math text book so worried....… Because he had to many problems

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can you touch your toes? no

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What did tyler say to Jake? My pussy is wet jew

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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COME HERE, POTTER!!!! NOW!!! Instead of agreeing to approach the source of the rather hostile summoning, Potter decided to sit down and eat a healthy vegetarian lunch of sausages and chips.

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What has seven legs and cant walk? A paraplegic, and I lied about five of those legs.

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Why did the black guy fell from the stairs? Because I threw him

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yo momma is so ugly, she attempted to get plastic surgery and then died from the amount of blood loss she got when the surgeons realized her head was filled with tumors and they failed to extract them.

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what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

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whats worse than the Holocaust....6 million Jews

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What device will find furniture in a poorly lit room every time? An infrared camera.

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Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

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Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

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No!

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I had a really great joke to tell you!

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what do u say to a girl after you have sex with her? i like cheese

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Two penguins walk are in the bathtub and says "can you pass me the soap?" the other one looks at him quite quarly and says "what do you think i am, a chainsaw?!?"

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A man spoke in a high-pitched voice. Another man said "Are you gay" He responded, "Why, yes"

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What do you say to a black guy who is holding a gun to your head? Nothing. He is holding a gun to your head.

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who should be competing in the paralympics? Brent the retard!

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What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

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A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops