Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead......

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A duplicate joke on anti-joke.com in an attempt to get thumbs up. Sad, sad people...

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Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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Granny porn!

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

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A Jew ran into a wall with a boner. He broke his nose first.

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Two scientists walk into a bar The first says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O, too.” Both of them receive water because the bartender is not irresponsible enough to serve concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

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poop.

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White NBA players.

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

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When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

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What did the mexican say to the black person? Hey there! How are you today?

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Your mom is soo black , she can go naked to a funeral.

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Q: What's the difference between a polar bear and a washing machine? A: Many things.

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Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

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Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Anonymous. Anonymous who? Exactly.

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A black man and a muslim enter a bar. The Black man pulls out a gun in an attempt to commit a robbery, however the muslim opened his jacket, screamed "Allah Akkbar" and blew himself up. Everyone died.

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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