"Why the long face?" The bartender asked. "I was born with a severe cleft palette and a jaw deformity. The surgery lets me eat and drink but my parents couldn't afford the cosmetic part of the surgery, the scarring got worse as I grew older. Can I have a beer please?" I replied.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Hey I just met you, And this is crazy, I've got dementia, Hey I just met you.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What did the fat man do? He fell over...

thumb_up thumb_down -3

what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Recycled jokes are about as good as a scalar roundabout... [L]

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How can you tell if a duck is quaking? Hear it

thumb_up thumb_down -3

2 squirrels with 2 massive boners and 1 little boner.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I'm sorry but your child seems to have fractured his spinal column and can no longer control any part of his body below his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

a jewish man walks into a wall with an erection. what hits first? his erection

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than dying in a car wreck with your family? You being the only one that dies.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How does God choose who goes to heaven? I'm just kidding, there's no God.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Simon: Knock Knock Alfredo: Who's there? Simon: Wire Alfredo: Wire Who SImon? Simon: Wire are you asking me this!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats the sad part of 4 negroes driving off a cliff? the car couldve fit 5

thumb_up thumb_down -5

you know whats worse than being cold? being colder

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: Whats horny and likes your leg? A: My dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Bro: Aww Dawg! What if they tell me I got da aids? Dawg!: Hey don worry bro, you gotta BE POSITIVE

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I just got AIDS, And soon so will you!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what class did Jimmy get an A in? None, he is dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops