What did the bi-polar girl do when she found our her ex-boyfriend was living with another woman? Nothing; she was happy for their new relationship and realized life moves on, in addition to taking the daily appropriate amount of medication prescribed by her doctor.

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What do you call a black Decepticon? Niggatron. What Pokemon is black? Niggachu. What lives in the sewers, eats pizza and is black? Teenage Mutant Nigga Turtles. What is Disney's most racist children's book? Winnie the Pooh and Nigger Too.

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What do a fish and an eagle have in common? They both live underwater aside from the eagle.

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wh did a man all of his bike? It was a wet and slippery day, he had a lack of control and concentration

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Q. What is the difference between a bird and a fly? A. A bird can fly, but a fly can't.

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Two muffins are in an oven. And by muffins I mean jews. They both die a horrible death.

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what's white, sits around all day, and sucks on tits? a baby.

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Why did jenny fall off the swing? ...Cause she has no arms Knock, Knock Who's there? not jenny

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Why was Timmy sore? He'd been playing with his cornhole along with his friends all day!

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What happened when the chicken got to the other side of the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender immediately shoots it in the face with a double barrel shotgun, ending the rabid animal's life

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Why was Carlos fired? Because he stole and smelled of weed.

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your moms so fat that she had to buy bigger cloths, her husband left her, she became a druggie and died alone.

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Why does Santa Claus drink so much hot Cocoa? Because Mrs. Claus got tired of his constant drunkenness and won't allow beer in the house in the house anymore.

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BIG MAC'S

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A black man, a white man and a Mexican walk into a bar. They have a beer, enjoy some pleasant conversation, then go home to their families.

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A man walks in to a bar and orders a drink. He has been drinking alone every day since his wife an unborn child died in an horrific car accident.

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How do you prevent a baby from crawling all over the place? You nail his hands to the floor

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what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

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What's tiny and smells like a big banana? A tiny banana

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One afternoon, a man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my youngest son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my second son is gay." the man replies. "Wow that's bad buddy, I'll buy you the drink, on the house." Two weeks later, the same man walks into a bar, looking sad and purchases a large drink. "Bad day?" the bartender asks, "I just found out my oldest son is gay." the man replies. "Doesn't anyone in your family like women?." the bartender asks. The man thinks about it. "Yeah, my wife."

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Knock knock Who's there? Guess who. You have 4 options: A. Jeremy Stevens B. Donald Jefferson C. Richard Gillespie D. Paul Faggot Um A? Nope, the correct answer is D. Paul Faggot Oh hi Paul, come in.

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A pirate walks into a bar with a wheel on his crotch, and the bartender says, "What's that?" and the pirate says, "A deadly tumor."

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Man walks into an apple store. Shortly after he leaves with a fully charged phone.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops