What starts with F and ends in UCK? The F word but im not allowed to say it.

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Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

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What does water smell like? water.

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The blond sold her her car for gass money and then when to a car dealer and asked for a free car if she got drunk for him the car dealer said yes only if i can do what i want with you the blond said what do u want to do to me he said i want to throw u off a cilff the blond said ok

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hellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohellohello

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a man says "whats shakin bakin" to a friend, but his friend was shaking, because he often has seizures... thats what was shakin

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What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

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You might be a redneck. Sorry.

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Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

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Why did a black kid kill his teacher? No reason. That what they do

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What did the cow say to the other cow when the boy asked him for something to drink? Probably MOOO! Considering that cows cant say anything except for that

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I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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Roses are red violets are blue this poem is stupid.

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What did the two Japanese men say to each other? I have no idea I don't speak Japanese

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How many Jews can you fit into a Volkswagen Beatle? Two in the front, two in the back, and one hundred in the ash tray.

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A dead guy walks into a grave.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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What do you call a moose with a 12 gauge shotgun bullet through it's head? Open Season

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How long does it take to build a wall? it depends on how big he wall is

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Why did the weiner dog puncture Doris's bladder? It got carried away during an oral sex session.

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whats fat round and mentally special? PeterPanMyHero!

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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