An englishman, an irishman and a scotsman walked into a bar. They were all lawyers out on lunch break and happened to walk into the same building. They laughed about the coincidence over the a drink

How come the dog didn't want to go into the sun? -Because it didn't want to turn into a hotdog.

Q-What's funnier than 24? A-Most black jokes

Don't you hate it when you have 5 dead bodies, and you don't know which one to shoot your load on? -no

what is orange? an orange

Argon walks into a bar. The bartender yells, "Get the hell out!" Argon doesn't react.

What did the physicist say when he got his penis stuck in a test tube? Ah jeesh! I got my penis stuck in a test tube.

What is worse than mistaking a bottle of blood for ketchup? Mistaking a bottle of "sticky white stuff" for milk... Moral: If you are a straight man that is... As for women meh... lie all you want ladies...

Why couldn't little Suzie snap her fingers? Her stepfather cut off her fingers after becoming a drunk and leaving her family.

Why did the little girl only walk half way across the street She fell into a man hole and died

Why did the chicken cross the road? Certainly not to have its motives questioned!

Hi.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

How many babies does it take to paint a house? That is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

Small Penis.

Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

Q: Why did the plane crash? A: Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Calling your penis a chose because it's small and fat.

why did jimmy fall of of the tractor? Because he is a potato

Fucked up quotes: "When walking trough hell, keep going!" (I just turn back and walk the other way thank you, I mean worst case I walk trough heaven right?" "Never give up, ever ever ever ever ever..." (Ill just end it with etc because I gave up something as hard as... Typing?) "Curiosity killed the cat" (Translated: "Curiosity kills, stay inside forever" What?)

Why was the black man crying? His wife left him, took his children, and most of his possessions in the divorce.

Q: What's the difference between Osama's death and Paris Hilton's bra? A: One is Osama's death and the other is Paris Hilton's bra.

What's worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm. Being raped. What's worse than being raped. Being raped twice. What's worse than being raped twice. Biting into your apple and finding a worm then throwing away that apple, retrieving another apple them biting into it and finding another worm then being raped twice. In the same 5 minutes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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