If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Roes are red Violets are blue I have a potato Let's make pie

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Q: What Would Canada Be With out Nature A: Peru

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Julian Ha.

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What does society have in common with laundry? They both get ruined when you mix colors with whites.

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Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

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don't read this

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

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You might be a redneck if you hate your father and you live in a trailer

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How do you keep someone in suspense? Refuse to let them view the resolultion of a gripping film.

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Colin is gay but toasters are not

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What do you call a Mad Cow? Dead. Pst, Mr.Cobb if your reading this- Hola.

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My wife told me that I should see things from a woman's point of view. So I looked out the kitchen window.

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A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Jack. Honey, Jacks here, will you get the door?

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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Why was the man choking? He was eating to fast.

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Making fun of Charlie Sheen is like shooting up in a barrel.

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A priest, a rabbi, and an imam walk into a bar. It's also a bistro, and they have a lovely lunch together.

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what happened to the little kid on a bicycle? Nothing

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What did you the blonde death amuptee child get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why wasn't the boy at school? Obviously it was the weekend.

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You know what's natural? Bears.

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During a boxing match, a white man faces an Asian. The Asian loses. Next the white man faces a Mexican. The Mexican also loses. Now the white man faces a black man. "Aw screw it!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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