What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, I'm blind.

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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What do you call a cat with no ears? Anything you fucking well like. Cats can't understand speech.

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What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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[] [] Those are eyes These are teeth

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Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

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a camel walks into a bar. it is kicked out because camels are not supposed to be in bars, there camels.

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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Man: I just bought this hearing aid Friend: How much did it cost Man: No it's 8 o'clock

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Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

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Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

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-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

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What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

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Why did the fish look like a human? Because it was a person, drowning.

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What do you call an animal killed on the side of the road? A false accusation towards an inanimate object that has no other purpose then providing a safe and smooth ride for drives all around the world.

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Two men walk into a bar and begin ordering drinks. Both men engage in polite conversation with each other. At the end of the night they each take taxi's home because they realize the potential risk they pose to others if they drive intoxicated.

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you pick up 10 students from a school, you buy a pish from the fet store, and then drive to new york whos driving the bus? a fat guy with a level 80 org in world of warcraft

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man walks into a bar his lack of awareness means that he didnt notice the maintenance sign in front of him he falls in a 200foot deep hole and dies.

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How tall is oprah.. 5'7

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What's 18 inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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woman's lacrosse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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