Asexuals aren't known for f***ing around.

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Your mom is so old, that when somebody told her to act her age, she died.

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Why did the cops beat up rodney king? Resisting arrest.

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i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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A man walks into a bar falls into the street and gets run over. It was very tragic

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What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

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What did the duck say to the other duck? Something, But us humans don't speak there language to understand

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Whats the difference between a person with cancer and breakfast? Breakfast is important

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I supported my sisters decision to get an abortion. Still would have been cool to be a dad :/

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

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Q: How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart? You don't. You just shut up and listen.

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Whats the difference between and ? Blue custard

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Why did the one friend hate the other friend? Because the one friend didnt do a map for social studies he should've done and skipped school for that class and when he came back, the other friend told the social studies teacher he was here and he had to turn in an unfinished poster and now he is a crybaby bitch about it.

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Well, its Eliza again, sorry to bother you Nero, I always thought you where good looking but I know that when it comes to you its not about the looks, you are far more than meets the eye. Neo-Nero was the guy we met at a certain meeting, the arrogant guy with the big forehead whose arms where shaking remember? I wont reveal more for his sake, he did not mean bad, he was just angry like the rest of us and felt responsible, again like many of us. So when can we meet you? I assume you wont be arriving soon, but Id really apreciate seeing you again, and considering neither I nor my parents (I asked them) have the money to come visit you, id appreciate a loan or something.

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How do the Chinese name their children? They decide on a name that both parents can agree upon, and they write that on the certificate of birth.

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Why did the Mexican go to Taco Bell? Because he thought it was a real restaurant.

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Why did the father smash his sons head into the dentist's building? Because he had a locker in his mouth. Also, equestrian.

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1. Go to the WRITE YOUR OWN! section on this website. 2. Check the box on "I have read and agreed to the Terms of Service." 3. The Submit button should become available for clicking. 4. Now uncheck the box. 5. Thumbs up if the Submit button is still available. -BG_Shank_A

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Build a man a fire and he will be warm for a night, set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life.

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Whats worse than one bee? Two bees. Whats worse than two bees? The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? Three bees.

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Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Women's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops